Podgamer » iPad

A little less remuneration

News Elvis — Fri, 26 Nov 2010 09:30:11 +0000

Uh-huh, thngyrvrmsh, omnomburghrburghrdrgsdrgs. Issanr POGUHMRSAYRUNUP, a-huh. (Continued...)

++ NAMCO = CHEAP ++

NEWS ROBOT — Thu, 25 Nov 2010 09:34:01 +0000

++ OBSERVATION: RETURN OF NAMCO SALE ++ ++ ENUMERATION: LISTED GAMES CONSIDERABLY / NOTICEABLY / NEGLIGIBLY REDUCED // DELETE AS APPLICABLE WITH STANDARDISED HOLE PUNCH ++ ++ ACTIVATE PODGAMER NEWS ROBOT REPORT DESIGN MODULE ++ ++ ACTIVATE PODGAMER NEWS ROBOT INTERJECTION MODULE ++ (Continued...)

Edge: Brick Dangerous

J Nash — Wed, 24 Nov 2010 09:33:54 +0000

I’ve been gathering a slow education about famous iThing games in order to avoid too many howlers born of ignorance. It’s a heck of a task that’s taking ages, because according to official figures there are fifty million thousand hundred pop culture titles and at least 12 good ones. Today: Edge. And the problem with Edge is that it’s too inventive. (Continued...)

++ GAMELOFT = CHEAP ++

NEWS ROBOT — Tue, 23 Nov 2010 23:04:38 +0000

++ UPDATE: REDUCTIONS INCONSISTENT. ERRORS CORRECTED ++ ++ OBSERVATION: RETURN OF GAMELOFT SALE ++ ++ ENUMERATION: LISTED GAMES REDUCED TO 59p/€0,79/99¢ ++ ++ INVENTORY: ASPHALT 5, BROTHERS IN ARMS (GLOBAL FRONT), HERO OF SPARTA 2, IRON MAN 2, LET US GOLF 2, NFL 2011, THE SETTLERS, SHREK KART, SPLINTER CELL CONVICTION, UNO ++ ++ OBSERVATION: iPAD VERSIONS ALSO INCLUDED IN SALE ++ ++ INVENTORY: ASPHALT 5 HD, BROTHERS IN ARMS (GLOBAL FRONT) HD, HERO OF SPARTA 2 HD, IRON MAN 2 HD, LET US GOLF 2 HD, NFL 2011 HD, THE SETTLERS HD, SHREK KART HD, SPLINTER CELL CONVICTION HD, UNO HD ++ (Continued...)

Tiltstorm: Tipping point

J Nash — Fri, 19 Nov 2010 20:53:31 +0000

In today’s modern convenient videogame shorthand, Tiltstorm would be Tempest Without Webs. (Actually, in today’s modern convenient videogame shorthand, Tiltstorm would be Not a WW2 Cover Shooter, WRY SATIRES.) The thing is, there’s a reason Tempest has webs. (Continued...)

Linkoidz: Magical alien balls drop

Craig Grannell — Thu, 18 Nov 2010 17:23:25 +0000

Magical Drop is great. Magical Drop for iOS is a pile of steaming shit. As a huge Magical Drop fan, the combination of the previous two statements has resulted in HULK SMASH anger for me since iOS gaming took hold; but now Linkoidz is here to save the day, providing similar dynamics to Data East’s title, but without controls that make you want to take a baseball bat to your device. (Continued...)

Tales of interest

Nathan Grayson — Thu, 18 Nov 2010 06:24:18 +0000

Normally “free” and “not shit” are enough to warrant a bark and a point from us, your trusty App Store hounds at Podgamer, but today I’ve decided to mix things up. See, while Brutal Fantasy-Prologue is definitely free and also gleefully slashy (though generically so) enough to cross the rickety bridge out of Shitsville and into Mediocrity Zone, it’s also – dare I say it – profound. Actually, I don’t dare say it, because it’s really not. But it is profound’s plainer, lose-the-glasses-and-we-might-have-something sister, “interesting.” See, in a slight twist on the normal App Store release formula, the full version of Brutal Fantasy won’t be out for another month, and this free Prologue – as you might expect – sports the beginnings of its storyline. What is that storyline, you ask? Uh, I think there was an evil knight or something like that. I didn’t really pay attention, but seeing as there are about three fantasy plots in existence, I’ve got a decent shot at being on the money. Point is, even if Brutal Fantasy-Prologue’s story physically spurted chopped liver out of my iPhone speaker, I wouldn’t have minded. It’s not important. What is important is the delivery of that story. (Continued...)

Zombie Crisis 3D: House Of The (Wish It Was) Dead

Nathan Grayson — Tue, 16 Nov 2010 08:03:13 +0000

Remember those House Of The Dead arcade machines from back in the day? You know, the ones with the big plastic guns that indirectly ate your first car in change? Weren’t they great? Well, Zombie Crisis 3D‘s a lot like that – only replace “great” with the most negative adjective you can think of. Horrendabysmal. Terribawfulstrosity. Dane Cook. Something along those lines. How so? Oh, let me count the ways. First off, the basics: You’re a person. You have a gun. You shoot zombies. And that is – quite literally – all. Your movement is, of course, on-rails, so your eyes, legs, and head – everything aside from your itchy trigger finger – are the game’s to control. No big deal, though, right? Highly scripted, gore-spattered thrill rides are what this genre’s all about, after all. Problem is, Zombie Crisis doesn’t seem to have gotten the memo. (Continued...)

Drift Mania Championship HD: The battle of b0rked drift

RevStu — Fri, 12 Nov 2010 22:01:50 +0000

Drift Mania Championship HD is free today. I’d had a brief play of the Lite version when it came out and dismissed it as an uncontrollable and dull stunt game (and I hate stunt games, because I’m not 12). So this seemed an ideal opportunity to give it a second chance, especially as I’d bought my iPhone 4 since then and would have a chance to admire its gleaming Retina graphics. I don’t think that’s actually them in the screenshot – it looks a lot crisper and shinier than that in real life, which begs the question of why a publisher would choose to use a low-res image when the high-res graphics are a sufficiently big deal as to be highlighted in the game’s title. But anyway. (Continued...)

From consoles with love

Nathan Grayson — Thu, 11 Nov 2010 06:36:11 +0000

Just because you can download 30 million new games per second on your newfangled iPodpadpodiummajig doesn’t mean console games have lost their luster. But there’s a price to pay for all those fancy big-name bells and whistles, and it is – shockingly enough – money. Or, to quote one of this generation’s wisest cultural mantras: “Mo’ money.” However, more money spent on iPhone games directly correlates to less bitches, and that simply will not do. Fortunately, a quartet of console imports have seen fit to trim a little off the top of their price tags, handily solving that incredibly pressing dilemma for you. First up, there’s Grand Theft Auto: Chinatown Wars, which is now a (TURN BACK NOW OR RISK DEATH BY HORRIBLE PUN) steal at £3.99/€5,49/$6.99. Yes, it’s still a wee bit pricey, but don’t let its “ants having a gangfight” facade fool you; it’s far-and-away one of the best GTA games out there. And this comes from someone who normally hates Grand Theft Auto. (Continued...)

No, Human: Rock opera

J Nash — Tue, 09 Nov 2010 23:21:26 +0000

One of splendid outer space deflection puzzler No, Human’s finest elements is the atmospherically perfect soundtrack of uncluttered, slightly melancholy classical piano pieces. Once again exhibiting the grasp and sensitivity that made Thief the Musical a byword for unscalped tickets, three unemployed louts from Exmouth have transformed the new game’s 80 zen levels of hypnotically replayable high score asteroid flinging into a rock opera that’s already enjoyed very nearly a run in very nearly a theatre. We contractually present an excerpt of what leading critic Preddington Quatt is already calling in sick to avoid. (Continued...)

Death Worm: Wormpocalypse, Pt. 2

Nathan Grayson — Tue, 09 Nov 2010 08:46:38 +0000

I’ve fallen in love with iThing “worm” games of late, and you all have to suffer for it. Yes, even you. Especially you. The latest one’s called Death Worm, but apparently it’s the original while the less intimidatingly named Super Mega Worm is the knock-off. Is PlayCreek LLC telling the truth? Or have giant world-ending worms figured out time travel, thus kicking off an eternal duel of Internet message board “first!” style one-upmanship? No idea. Both options seem equally likely. What I do know is that Death Worm’s better. Well, mostly. For one, it’s made the giant, helicopter-gulping leap from NES-era graphics to something more befitting of, say, the Super Nintendo. And this comes only a month after Super Mega Worm. Score one for the time travel theory. Also, you get to pick and choose your pink, wriggly powers and stats as you level up, which – while not enormously game-altering – adds a degree of customization to your apocalyptic exploits. Long and fast or hard and strong? The (incredibly phallic) choice is yours! (Continued...)

The biggest show on Earth

RevStu — Sat, 06 Nov 2010 15:28:17 +0000

It’s generally accepted by most sane people that if you want to make money out of something – particularly if it’s something that costs almost nothing to physically produce - you sell it cheap. The mainstream videogames industry is almost alone in continuing to resist this reality. Despite comparable businesses like music and film having slashed the unit price of their products by something like 50% over the last decade (I still remember when new-release music CDs fetched £13.99 or more, and new movies on DVD went for £20-25), the price of games has edged steadily upwards since the advent of disc-based media, with £45 the normal RRP for new Xbox 360 or PS3 games. Some premium titles push that already-horrendous sum up by as much as another £10, plus there are numerous comedy “Special Editions” aimed at the super-gullible, charging as much as £30 or £40 more for discs or books full of screenshots, or little plastic toys. Now, of course, there’s another way. (Continued...)

++ RAGDOLL BLASTER 2 = FREE ++

NEWS ROBOT — Fri, 05 Nov 2010 20:36:07 +0000

++ OBSERVATION: iPHONE/TOUCH VERSION BRIEFLY FREE ++ ++ OBSERVATION: iPAD VERSION £2.99/€3,99/$4.99 ++ ++ OBSERVATION: BALLISTICALLY PROPELLED SEWN COMPANION CRUELTY SIMULATOR ++ ++ OBSERVATION: GUNPOWDER HURTLESQUEAK ++ ++ PODGAMER NEWS ROBOT DOES NOT UNDERSTAND HUMANS ++ ++ SAD ++ ++ SAD ++ ++ SAD ++

Go west. “You are likely to be eaten by a grue.”

Craig Grannell — Fri, 05 Nov 2010 19:04:54 +0000

Ah, Sunday afternoons with an 8-bit computer, a text adventure and INSTANT DEATH. What could be more fun? If your answer is “nothing, sir” and not “beating myself to death with a spanner”, you should probably download the rather spiffy, universal and suddenly very (but probably temporarily) free Frotz right this second. Frotz is a Z-Machine interpreter, enabling you to play more text adventures than you can shake a stick at (including the original Zork). And if you’ve some Z-Machine files lying about on your (“Legally purchased compilations” – Ed), you can upload them via FTP. Even better, because Frotz is universal, the iPad interface gives you a keyboard that doesn’t make your thumbs want to die after you’ve been playing Hitchhiker’s Guide To The Galaxy for five hours.