Review
Gunstar Zeroes
by Craig Grannell (November 26th, 2010 at 1:00 pm)
Hmmm.
... From playing this game!
Argh.
... If you have any sense!
Universal News
A little less remuneration
by News Elvis (November 26th, 2010 at 9:30 am)
Uh-huh, thngyrvrmsh, omnomburghrburghrdrgsdrgs.
Issanr POGUHMRSAYRUNUP, a-huh. Continue reading this post…
Review 
Podgamer Recommended
Gnawly, dude!
by Craig Grannell (November 25th, 2010 at 3:56 pm)
The Rat is back. After being On The Run (innovative, demanding one-thumb platforming jump-o-game with several modes) and On A Scooter (cute one-thumb jump-o-game with several modes), he’s now trying to be all cool, On A Skateboard (you guessed it: one-thumb jump-o-game with several modes).
So: gameplay. The imaginatively named Ratty has been glued to a skateboard and shoved into scary and demanding courses. The only way to help him escape from the skateboard is to ‘collide’ with helpful obstacles, whereupon he’s liberated from his shackles, flying out of the screen to his freedom/doom (depending on what he lands on). It’s a tough life being a rat.
Gnarly, dude! Totally rad! *gets shot* *dies*
If you want to play the game properly, though, you’ll have to ensure Ratty survives until the end of each of the 30 challenge courses, or, in the case of Power Stunts and Banana Harbour, forever, since they’re randomly generated and infinitely long.
Continue reading this post…
Universal News
++ NAMCO = CHEAP ++
by NEWS ROBOT (November 25th, 2010 at 9:34 am)
++ OBSERVATION: RETURN OF NAMCO SALE ++
++ ENUMERATION: LISTED GAMES CONSIDERABLY / NOTICEABLY / NEGLIGIBLY REDUCED // DELETE AS APPLICABLE WITH STANDARDISED HOLE PUNCH ++
++ ACTIVATE PODGAMER NEWS ROBOT REPORT DESIGN MODULE ++
++ ACTIVATE PODGAMER NEWS ROBOT INTERJECTION MODULE ++ Continue reading this post…
Review
Doesn’t deliver
by Craig Grannell (November 24th, 2010 at 1:25 pm)
Can there be a more thankless task than getting up at the crack of dawn to scribble addresses on loads of newspapers for delivery to ungrateful sods who moan if their daily collection of bile is a nanosecond late? If your answer is “Why, how about playing Paperboy on your iThing?” that would be pretty harsh—but not by much.
Paperboy is in fact the second version of the game to appear on the App Store, after the first was mysteriously kidnapped by a ninja disguised as Rupert Murdoch, wearing an Atari hat. Glu’s remake is somewhat faithful to the original—which means you’ll get dunked in a swimming pool of nostalgia jam, before realising that one of the ingredients of nostalgia jam is rotten entrails.
Universal Review
Brick Dangerous
by J Nash (November 24th, 2010 at 9:33 am)
I’ve been gathering a slow education about famous iThing games in order to avoid too many howlers born of ignorance. It’s a heck of a task that’s taking ages, because according to official figures there are fifty million thousand hundred pop culture titles and at least 12 good ones.
Today: Edge. And the problem with Edge is that it’s too inventive. Continue reading this post…
Universal News
++ GAMELOFT = CHEAP ++
by NEWS ROBOT (November 23rd, 2010 at 11:04 pm)
++ UPDATE: REDUCTIONS INCONSISTENT. ERRORS CORRECTED ++
++ OBSERVATION: RETURN OF GAMELOFT SALE ++
++ ENUMERATION: LISTED GAMES REDUCED TO 59p/€0,79/99¢ ++
++ INVENTORY: ASPHALT 5, BROTHERS IN ARMS (GLOBAL FRONT), HERO OF SPARTA 2, IRON MAN 2, LET US GOLF 2, NFL 2011, THE SETTLERS, SHREK KART, SPLINTER CELL CONVICTION, UNO ++
++ OBSERVATION: iPAD VERSIONS ALSO INCLUDED IN SALE ++
++ INVENTORY: ASPHALT 5 HD, BROTHERS IN ARMS (GLOBAL FRONT) HD, HERO OF SPARTA 2 HD, IRON MAN 2 HD, LET US GOLF 2 HD, NFL 2011 HD, THE SETTLERS HD, SHREK KART HD, SPLINTER CELL CONVICTION HD, UNO HD ++ Continue reading this post…
Review
Ninja tunes
by Craig Grannell (November 23rd, 2010 at 1:00 pm)
Most rhythm action games lack a threat. In Guitar Hero, the baying crowd might boo a bit if you miss a note. Think how much better you’d be if missing a note meant getting STABBED REPEATEDLY IN THE FACE. This, as far as I can tell, is the premise behind Rhythm Spirit.
Stabbed Repeatedly In The Face For Screwing Up Hero™
Review Podgamer Recommended
Fathomable
by J Nash (November 23rd, 2010 at 9:32 am)
One of the acest things about iThing players is that we’ll try anything. There’s a brave indie contingent on, say, the Xbox, but you can’t imagine the general Xbox ownership queuing in their thousands at midnight to shoot each other over mishandled copies of Squid Yes! Not So Octopus. The iThing, on the other hand, has no artifice: the charts are equally as likely to be topped by heavily promoted big name rubbish like Assassin’s Creed as out of nowhere surprise zeitgeist rubbish like Angry Birds. We are cosmopolitan idiots.
We’re also pretty and charming, unlike PC owners (fat), Xbox owners (drunk) and nobody could find any PS3 owners to determine what was wrong with them, and anyway Seaweed. Continue reading this post…
Review Podgamer Recommended
Trucker’s Edge
by Craig Grannell (November 22nd, 2010 at 3:00 pm)
Vrrrmmmmm! MONSTER TRUCKS! Actually, I’m not Am-er-i-can, and since US import Grayson isn’t within earshot, I cannot ask what the appeal of BIG TRUCKS is, bar when you’re a kid and use them to run over next door’s cat. (That never happened, by the way, if you’re reading, Mr Griffiths of number 5. TIDDLES RAN AWAY.) What I can say is that they make for a pretty fun game, at least when they’re part of Monster Trucks Nitro. VRRRRRRMMMMMM!
